Let's Circle Back.
500 Things Your Boss Said — Decoded at Last
A Funny Office Gift for Coworkers & BossesComing October 25
Leave your email and we'll tell you the day it's on Amazon. One email. No follow-ups.
Finally. A translator for the office.
“Let’s circle back.” “Per my last email.” “Do you have the bandwidth?” Every office speaks a language nobody actually understands. This book decodes 500 classic pieces of office-speak, from onboarding and endless meetings to reply-all disasters, video calls, performance reviews and the office fridge, so everyone can finally understand what the boss is actually saying.
Warning: THIS BOOK COULD HAVE BEEN AN EMAIL.
- 500 numbered office-isms, decoded
- 43 original illustrations
- A–Z index of every quote
- Fill-in pages for your own boss’s originals
Look inside
10 of the 500 entriesPer my last email...
TRANSLATION: Please read the email. The email you ignored.
It's a quick ask.
TRANSLATION: It is a three-week project.
Let's circle back.
TRANSLATION: Nobody will ever bring this up again.
Let's put a pin in it.
TRANSLATION: The pin is permanent. The idea is dead.
Please see attached.
TRANSLATION: There is no attachment.
Urgent!
TRANSLATION: It is not urgent. It is Friday at 4:55 p.m.
I'm at capacity.
TRANSLATION: No. Professionally.
It's 90 percent done.
TRANSLATION: The last 10 percent will take three months.
Holiday party!
TRANSLATION: Open bar until 8:30. Then a cash bar. Then stories people tell until March.
It's on the roadmap.
TRANSLATION: It will never happen.
What's inside
- Entries
- 500
- Pages
- 176
- Size
- 6 × 9 in
- Printed in
- Full color
43 original illustrations, an A–Z index of every quote, and fill-in pages for your own boss's originals.
Chapters
- Welcome Aboard
- Let's Circle Back.
- Per My Last Email
- Synergy & Other Buzzwords
- Bandwidth & Capacity
- Quick Sync: The Video Call
- Deadlines & EOD
- The Performance Review
- Team Building & Office Culture
- Kitchen, Printer & Thermostat
- Restructuring & Change
- Vision & Strategy
- Out of Office
- Why We Work
Questions
Is it appropriate for kids?
Yes. There is no swearing and nothing you would need to explain at dinner. It is written for adults, but kids old enough to recognize their parents' work calls tend to read it out loud.
Is there a Kindle version?
Yes. The Kindle edition has all 500 entries and the illustrations, and it costs less than the paperback.
Can I gift the Kindle version?
Yes. On the Kindle book's Amazon page, choose “Buy for others” and Amazon emails it to the person on the date you pick.
How big is it?
It is a 6 × 9 inch paperback with 176 pages: 500 numbered entries, 43 original illustrations, an A–Z index and a few fill-in pages for their own originals.
Is it full color?
Yes. Every page is printed in full color, illustrations included.
