Funny gifts for Dad (birthday, or any time)

Buying for Dad is hard because Dad has everything. What he doesn’t have, he’ll tell you he doesn’t need, and then he’ll buy it himself the next weekend at the hardware store.

There is one thing he can’t get for himself, which is a full translation of everything he has ever said.

I’m Just Resting My Eyes. collects 500 classic dad sayings and decodes them in the style of a dictionary. “I’ll fix it this weekend.” Translation: it will never be fixed. “The remote was right here.” Translation: the remote is under Dad. The entries are grouped into chapters like The Road Warrior, The Climate Guardian, The Grill Master and The IT Helpdesk, so every part of the dad experience is covered.

It’s a good birthday gift from a daughter or son, a fun gift from the whole family, and a decent gag gift that he’ll actually keep. It’s fully illustrated and printed in full color, with an A–Z index and blank pages at the back for his own originals.

If his birthday is today, the Kindle edition costs less than a coffee and arrives instantly. If it’s next week, get the paperback. He’ll leave it on the arm of the couch, where it will be read.