for Grandpa
Did I Ever Tell You About…
A Funny Birthday & Father's Day Gift for Grandpa
Coming November 1. Paperback and Kindle.
Gift guide
Funny gifts for Grandpa
Grandpa doesn’t want anything. He wants you to come visit. He wants to tell you about the time he drove to Ohio in a snowstorm with no heat, which he has told you before, and which gets a little better every time.
Did I Ever Tell You About… is a dictionary of everything Grandpa says, decoded. It has 500 entries. “Did I ever tell you about the time…” Translation: he did, forty times, and it gets better every time. “I paid a nickel for that.” Translation: in 1953, and Grandpa still expects a nickel. The chapters go from the porch and the weather report to the garage full of coffee cans, the diner and the early-bird special.
It’s a gift that gets him talking, which he’ll enjoy, and gets the family laughing, which he’ll enjoy more. Every spread is illustrated in full color. At the back there are blank pages for his own originals, so a grandkid can sit with him and fill them in.
It works for his birthday, Father’s Day, Grandparents Day or Christmas. He’ll say you shouldn’t have, and then read the whole thing before dinner.
The book
A few entries
GRANDPA SAYS: No. 001
Did I ever tell you about the time...
TRANSLATION: He did. Forty times. It gets better every time.
GRANDPA SAYS: No. 406
Yes, dear.
TRANSLATION: The secret to 55 years of marriage. Said with love.
GRANDPA SAYS: No. 082
What's that behind your ear?
TRANSLATION: It is a quarter. Grandpa is a magician.
GRANDPA SAYS: No. 116
Hand me that coffee can.
TRANSLATION: There are 30 coffee cans. Each one is full of screws. None are labeled.
GRANDPA SAYS: No. 187
I paid a nickel for that.
TRANSLATION: In 1953. Grandpa still expects a nickel.
GRANDPA SAYS: No. 234
Let's get the early bird special.
TRANSLATION: Dinner at 4 p.m. Half price. Grandpa is thrilled.
Questions
What do you get a grandpa who doesn't want anything?
A book about the one thing he's always happy to talk about, which is himself in 1958. Did I Ever Tell You About… is his stories and sayings, decoded.
Is it easy to read?
Yes. It's a 6 × 9 inch full-color book with clear type, short entries and an illustration on nearly every spread.
Is there a Grandma book too?
Yes. Have You Eaten? is the Grandma book. They make a good pair for a grandparents' anniversary.